Special Issue – Dec 2010
(at the end of a tumultuous decade)
THE CENTURION CHRONICLE
Special Issue – Dec 2010
CHRISTMAS DAYS OF YORE
(debutants galore….gift-wrapped for the occasion…and a hard lesson learned)
At the risk of being totally politically incorrect, indulge me for a bit, as I reminisce about times long past, in old St. Louis, when even the still bloody rumbles of World War Two, couldn't get in the way of Christmas partying. In fact, in this case, Christmas 1944, came at the climax of that war in Europe, with some of the bloodiest fighting yet to come.
But, the insouciance of youth, and socially privileged youth at that, was not about to let a little old war dampen its Christmas festivities which, traditionally, was one continuous round of balls, parties, eggnog and brandied bashes, and feasting, of one kind or another. For the last ten days of the year, Christmas through New Year, everyone literally lived in their party clothes (tuxedos and gowns) for most of that time.
Of course, winter snows could get in the way sometimes, but, boots, fur hats, coats, scarves and warm gloves and mittens, ensured no one caught cold. Besides, helping "blossoming" debutantes out of such gear, to reveal lusciously bear shoulders and artfully arranged cleavage, barely held in by low-cut ball gowns, made it an even greater delight for their hormonal teenage escorts. It was truly debutantes galore….all gift-wrapped for the occasion.
St. Louis "society" in those days was not just affluent it was filthy rich, from mostly so- called "old money"…which wartime industry profits simply made grander. In its day it was the jet-set, with private railcars, ocean liners, and the occasional airplane, instead of private jets. But, wealth was not the critical measure of social status there. Family lineage and connections (the more ancient French-related the better) determined how one was allowed to be part of it. So, tradition and ceremonial social rituals were of great importance. And part of that was the cardinal rule of – noblesse oblige – the class obligation which required doing good things for the less fortunate of the community.
So while Christmas was the occasion for much merrymaking and conspicuous consumption (not to mention as much fun and games with the opposite sex as could be had), it still involved certain civic activities, such as fund raising for various charitable city programs.
One of the ways funds were raised in that season was with –carolers – In each and every neighborhood groups of a dozen, or more, were organized and licensed to go door to door in their designated area to –carol- for donations. Each group carried a red painted specially capped, sealed, and numbered, water bucket, in which donations received were inserted through a slot in the cover. At the end of the caroling, these buckets were then turned in to the city's collection centers set up for that purpose.
Thus, there was great competition to put together as large and as well-voiced a group as possible, for those who undertook that duty. The larger and better costumed and sounding groups of carolers always got more and bigger donations. It was a fine way to support charitable programs and social services.
Our gilded youth, naturally, engaged in some serious maneuvering and campaigning to get the best possible group together. Of course, ulterior motives were also in play. Everyone vied for getting paired up with some of the "hottest" bimbettes, and "hunkiest" stud muffins available. To be frank, we "hunks" never really had any control over the situation. The "hotties" were the real deciders about who was going to be with whom. And most of the time, being hormonal teenagers, we stud-muffins didn't really care what they decided for us. Just being part of such a mob, and having a shot at some fantasied moments of bliss to be….was good enough.
The system worked like this: Right after Thanksgiving, the grand dames and chaperons of society would begin making calls to gather these packs of civic minded youth. Eventually, formal invitation cards would arrive, giving the selectees their assigned group number, and where the first get-together for practice and rehearsal would be. This was usually at someone's mansion house either on mansion row facing Forest Park, or, at one of St. Louis' peculiar gated-block enclaves (a number of which still remain in what is now known as the West End).
These gatherings were somewhat informal, but food and drink spreads were the norm, and rehearsals tended to degenerate into some serious partying. Still, things were never allowed to go beyond certain limits. Fun and hi-jinks were okay, but we were there to work up some good routines, so, somehow, this was usually achieved at an acceptable level of quality despite all that.
Somewhere around the middle of December, the holiday balls and cotillions began, intermixed with private parties and other gatherings. For the better part of two weeks it was round after social round, leaving of an evening, only returning in the wee hours of morning. Sleep…became an unknown luxury.
The big day arrived on Christmas Eve. Dressed in our finest costumes, we gathered at the designated house. There we had a light buffet spread, and other goodies to help keep us warm, were handed our donation bucket (now decked out with a few decorations), and off we'd go….caroling around our assigned area, collecting donations, and otherwise having a grand old time of it. One of the main reasons for that being many of the folks who opened their doors to our caterwauling, besides their donations, would also insist on providing us with eggnog, toddies, hot rum punch, and so on. By the end of our caroling time, our condition was "wobbly" to say the least.
So we would troop back to where we had started, to warm and otherwise revive ourselves. This required close huddling (and cuddling) by the nearest fireplace available, as we told and re-told some of the zanier aspects of our caroling efforts. Then, it was time for the main event of Christmas Eve. It was a long standing tradition, and everyone in St. Louis, regardless of denomination, did their best to be there for midnight mass at the Cathedral.
The St. Louis Cathedral is a full scale replica of the Byzantine St. Sophia, in Istanbul. Its domed spaces are stupendous, easily containing thousands of people. Its mosaics rival the grandest in the world, covering every nook and cranny from floor to top of its domes. And when it is all lit up for that occasion, the setting is truly awe inspiring. Thus the combination of that mass's rituals, the live nativity scenes, the massive organ, and the choirs, culminating with everyone there joining their voices with these for a truly impressive rendition of Handel's Messiah, made that Midnight Mass event the one place in the city where everyone tried to be. It was a grand community tradition.
And on that Christmas Eve, 1944, everyone there was especially moved. Thankful for the possible end of the war in Europe, and desperately hoping it would soon be over in the Pacific. It was a spiritually and otherwise heartfelt moment.
Even so, though somewhat sobered by it all, we trooped back afterwards for the traditional post-mass feast, this time at the mansion of another designated host for the occasion. Snow was falling, and someone in the group had arranged for a half dozen sleighs to carry us all to it. Our destination was only some six or seven blocks away, but it was a truly –Jingle Bells – moment. By the time we arrived there we were all in a strong party mood again.
I don't recall much about that party, beyond it being one of the plushest and festive ones yet. The mansion had a huge ball room, with a hot jazz band which soon had everyone cavorting in complete abandon. Its main dining room had a most opulent buffet spread, laid out on one of the biggest and most massive conference tables I'd ever seen, covered with several damask spreads that almost reached to the floor. Ice sculptures, and other decorations, made it a feast for the eyes, not just our mouths. And the sideboards held an array of eggnog, brandy and rum punches, which uniformed servants kept refilling as fast as their contents disappeared. It was enough to make Lucullus jealous.
Well, at some point in the festivities, I eventually found myself on the floor, under that table, happily sandwiched between two luscious debutantes who had apparently joined me there…all three of us dead to the world, closely cuddled together under several fur coats tumbled over us. Neither of the young ladies stirred, as I came to, tried to stretch, staring at the underside of that table and wondering what sort of secret magical cave I had stumbled into. Slowly, I began extricating myself from between these two lovelies, still gift-wrapped in their fancy gowns, still dead to the world, softly purring away, with the residual of their perfumes, and their warmth, making me sorely tempted to just stay put…and enjoy the situation even longer.
But I sensed it was coming on to dawn, and I had to get home to meet my obligations there. Christmas morning was not a time to be late or absent from my grandmother's traditional planned gathering for it. So, giving each of my ladies a chaste peck on the cheek, and an impish pat on their rumps, I managed to worm myself from between them, and out from under that table.
Standing up and stretching, I looked about the room. All around me were others curled up or otherwise laid out, still in their party clothes, and all dead to the world too. The festivities must have really ended with a crash.
Straightening out my tux, which was a wrinkled and spotted mess, I wobbled out towards the entry hall of that mansion where I somehow managed to find my coat, hat, muffler, and gloves, quietly opened the front door, and then stepped outside.
It was still dark, but a faint glimmer of dawn was beginning to show. Snow was ankle deep. The cold air hit my face like a thousand tiny needles. Though not far away, only six blocks or so, it was going to be a hard slog, so I started trotting, my footfalls muffled by the snow. All the while I kept happily humming to myself. It had been one hell of a Christmas Eve celebration. My only unhappiness about it was that I had absolutely no idea who those lovely girls under the table with me were (and to this day I've never found out. C'est la vie).
About a block away from my grandmother's place, I slowed to a walk. The house near the corner was a familiar one, but I knew very little about those neighbors. In fact few of us knew anything about them, and, unlike most of the other houses on that block, this one seemed strangely dark and undecorated. But, as I passed the walkway leading up to their front porch, I noticed something. One of the windows had two small Christmas lights feebly casting a glow on something hanging between them. For some reason I needed to see what it was.
I had barely taken two steps towards that window, when I realized what it was. It was the little banner families hung in their windows, with a blue star, to show one of theirs was serving the country. But this one was different, because it had not one but two….gold stars.
The realization of what that meant came as a shock. While I had been partying all night, these folks only had that little banner with two gold stars to hang up in their window, with just two small lights for decoration. I ran as fast as I could the rest of the way home, too shamed to do anything else but crawl into bed as soon as I got there, praying I would never forget what sacrifices those two gold stars signified, so that the rest of us could celebrate the joy of Christmas as we did.
It was a hard lesson learned.
CENTURION
THE CENTURION CHRONICLE
Special Issue – Dec 2010
CARIBOU HERDS OF SHOPPERS
(stampeding through the malls)
Ah, good old Christmas time!
It seems that regardless of the circumstances, no matter what the state of the country might be in, Black Friday is always the start of a massive stampede through the malls….all in the name of ….bargains, bargains, bargains.
The scenes of frantic shoppers bashing and smashing their way through opening doorways, reminds me of those migrating herds of caribou, relentlessly plowing their way through deepest snow, shying away from trailing wolf packs, and other obstacles, just to reach whatever ultimate destination their instincts drive them to seek.
For me, none of that has much meaning or relation to what we once called…. Christmas. Oh, sure, we still have all the traditional sound effects and symbols scattered around us. Canned sound tracks of –Jingle Bells-, or, - Jingle Bell Rock – etc., Salvation Army bell ringers, politically correct light-weight Santas, lights of every color combination imaginable, and, the finest of fake plastic trees our Chinese friends can produce (some even with an artificial pine scent….probably from a bit of sprayed on Pinesol…baby!), all, to get us in the mood. A mood to shop, shop, and shop….till we drop.
Somehow, all of these things just don't make it even begin to look like Christmas anymore, and, given that, maybe they should give the lyrics of that song an extreme make-over. They no longer fit the situation.
Well, I've come up with my own counter to all this annual moment of madness for a latter-day ersatz holiday. A few years back, I had a large wreath of mostly spiny and thorny branches made up. It's a good two feet in diameter. Across this brambled excuse for a Christmas decoration on the front door, is a wide bright red ribbon, on which, in big white letters, you can read the following -WARNING! HIBERNATING GRIZZLY.DO NOT DISTURB TILL APRIL- And so….no one does.
Which is fine by me because that leaves me in a blissfully tranquil place, comfortably eased back in my chair, a snifter filled with a generous ration of old, old, cognac in one hand, and extracted-from-its-refrigerated-plastic-hideaway, one of Cuba's finest, slimmest, cheroots, in the other. Now,THAT, makes it begin to truly feel, look, and sound like Christmas.
Mush, you caribou, mush!
CENTURION
You have to watch this. It's a kick in the ass!
LT Bobby Ross
THE CENTURION CHRONICLE
Special Issue – Nov 2010
PANGS OF COLD WAR REFLUX DISEASE
(from its last pawn still standing)
I left Korea some sixty years ago, grown old, at 22, from that brief experience there. I've never been back.
Today, North Korea is the last Cold War pawn still standing, still being manipulated in the same moves and counter-moves of that era between China and America. And after all that passage of time, despite the fact that the Cold War has passed into history, and relations between China and America have evolved, nothing seems to have changed. China is still manipulating that pawn, creating pangs of Cold War Reflux Disease for America and its South Korean ally.
Plainly, at this point in our mutual history, this is a ridiculous situation. A situation neither China nor the America really need or want. So why is it still going on?
In part, because, the inmates of China's North Korean asylum have not only progressively taken over their asylum, they have also managed to acquire nuclear capabilities along the way. In the process they have morphed from just being an extreme totalitarian application of the Communist gospel, into a very avaricious and ruthless kleptocracy. One which maintains its grip on power solely for the purpose of keeping everything worth anything there, in their hands, and no one else's. Ideology is just the means to that end.
Meanwhile, China's commissars have evolved from their ideological perspectives into a very affluent and octopus-like oligarchy of their own, whose tentacles reach into almost every nook and cranny of their empire. The difference, of course, is the more sophisticated and silky-smooth way they've gone about it. The irony, of course, is that they have simply come full circle, and reverted back to the same formula so successfully applied by their former imperial ancestors over the past five thousand years. Simply put, whereas before their kleptocrats and oligarchs wore yellow silk, today's version wears red underwear. Other than that…nothing much has changed.
Here, in America, our own kleptos have become an oligarchic class of ever growing influence and power. Different in style, perhaps, but essentially, cut from the same cloth as their Chinese counterparts. It's no wonder then that they get along so well, with each one vying to see which one can be quicker and slicker at cheating the other. So, this last relic of the Cold War should be a mutual embarrassment, because its unpredictability and paranoia could really gum up the works of such a game for both China and America.
For no other reason then, it's time to put it down as firmly and strongly as possible, because these Pyongyang morons may draw both into another useless military meat-grinder situation. We lost too many of the best and brightest of our youths the last time, and the thought of it happening again because of some pretentious miscalculations on their part, stirs a great upwelling of anger and disgust in me.
The big question now is why China is being so mute and seemingly unengaged in this current situation? With hardly any effort it could squash its upstart pawn, now gone rogue, like a bug if it wanted to. Instead it continues to stall and equivocate about it.
The answer may be multi-facetted. That is:
a) It may not really have as much control over it as it once had, and, because China's former commissars are now its klepto/oligarchic leadership busily making their fortunes while expanding their country's global economic domination and power, they prefer to let that sleeping dog lie, unless and until it is absolutely necessary to put it down.
b) Its continued presence on China's front porch, so to speak, keeps America off-balance and distracted, making that nuclear capable pawn a useful bargaining chip in whatever negotiations it might engage with it.
c) Lastly, it is a useful buffer against the economic and social dynamism of South Korea. So long as it sustains the Pyongyang mob in power, China is guaranteed that there is no possibility of a re-unified and booming Korean Republic, smack dab against its borders. That would be a much too dangerous model of a relatively open and prosperous society influencing its own internal elements of dissent. And the temptation for cross-border defections would just be too strong.
So, perhaps now is the time for us to bluntly ask China – which is more important to you, us….or them? Maybe then it will be possible to formulate an effective joint-action to permanently contain these North Korean fits of insanity.
Even so, until Peking's oligarchs become convinced that getting rid of Pyongyang's hierarchs will be to their financial advantage, and won't disrupt their grip on the levers of political power….nothing will change. North Korea will remain an irritating boil on the ass of the global community, which only a violent "lancing" will ever do away with it.
But, for everyone involved, that is the very worst kind of Russian roulette game to be playing.
CENTURION
THE CENTURION CHRONICLE Special Issue – Nov – 2010 GROPING FOR SECURITY (the friendly skies are getting way too friendly) It's difficult to decide whether the latest security procedures implemented by our TSA are, indeed, serious efforts to make our air travel here in America even safer than before, or, just another example of bureaucratic knee-jerk reactions to continuing threats and incidents attempted against us. On the face of it we have the impression that the TSA has applied an ancient Chinese solution for dealing with 1000 suspects, among which there is at least one known criminal. That is, lop off all 1000 heads, and voila, you have the guarantee that you've eliminated that one criminal. The rest, to use a modern euphemism, are simply – collateral damage. Granted, with the volume of travelers flying hither and yon, it is a problem trying to figure out how to separate wing nuts having nasty kinds of death wishes….from everyone else. Still, one would think that there has to be a way to go about it without classifying the rest of us as "suspects." Super vision technology, with see-through capabilities, is apparently one answer to that problem. Of course, such equipment is very expensive, and, there are some unknown health risks from it, particularly for those who are very frequent flyers, who thus have to go through that gauntlet more than the rest of us. Minimal radiation is still – radiation- and such a process does have cumulative effects. As for the groping for security part, that's just making the friendly skies way too friendly for my tastes. And a lot of others probably feel the same. So, what can be done about that? The answer I've come up with may not please everyone, but, I do believe it might make the process seem less distasteful…..that is….allow travelers to choose which gender they prefer to have for that groping procedure. For myself, I'd feel much less offended being groped by a burly female TAS agent, than otherwise, others, might prefer the opposite. Oh well, as they say in la belle France….chacun a son degout. CENTURION
THE CENTURION CHRONICLE
Special Issue – Nov 2010
IT JUST TAKES POLITICAL RHETORIC TO DO NOTHING
(but it takes political guts to do….something)
Our recent – Second American Revolution – may have altered the political landscape, and rattled the cages of many career politicos in both of the major parties; but, from the hot air rhetoric now being exhaled by these back in Washington, any expectations that we tax-paying voters might have had that such a revolution was going to create some real change there….are rapidly dimming.
Like all losers in an election battle, especially when they really get a "shellacking" like this one, the Democrats are now crying in their political beers, and whining about the need for bi-partisanship to solve our country's problems. Last time…it was the Republicans doing the same moaning. One might call it political – kharma – I suppose.
On the other hand, the Republicans, flush from their election victories aren't saying much of anything meaningful about anything….and doing even less, beyond licking their political chops in anticipation of ripping as much of the Obama agenda to shreds as possible.
Meanwhile, the rest of us are left still sucking eggs, and wondering if anything will ever be right again. So much for "revolution".
So what were we expecting to happen from this last political donnybrook? Actually, not much, only, at least, we did want some reasonable token efforts to set us back on a decently forward path, such as:
1) In a momentary bout of leadership-by-example, we thought they might announce a collective agreement to call for a 10% cut in compensation for everyone in the Federal structure for the next two years. That is, starting from the President, all Cabinet members, all Agency heads, and all members of Congress, plus all the rank and file of the aparatnik bureaucracy as well. Instead, they are making further moves to go in the opposite direction, seeking further increases above and beyond what they've already received from us.
2) That they would quietly, without further debate or argument, extend the current tax rates for another two years. Instead, they are indulging in their usual class warfare debates about who deserves them or not.
3) As a token of their "serious concerns" about our deficit spending and ever increasing national debt loads, propose that every fiscal year budget for the same two years would have a 15% across the board cut, right off the top.
While the cumulative impacts of such bi-partisan action might only provide modest forward reduction effects on our deficit spending habits and the national debt, it would demonstrate to both we taxpayers here at home, and to the rest of the world at large, that America was making a positive effort, having finally displayed real political – leadership-, and our country was now heading in a good direction. A few baby steps, to be sure, but at least they would be forward baby steps. As the old financial adage puts it that would be - cash now, money later.
All of which would do much to restore confidence with business and industry, providing a better certitude about the near term future. In turn, that would further motivate these sectors to consider expanding and hiring again, thereby beginning a trend that would slowly reduce the currently unacceptable level of unemployment.
Lastly, of course, we should not forget all those empty promises made back in'06 and '08 that our troops would be out of both Iraq and Afghanistan, and all brought home. Those promises have not only not been kept they have been largely abandoned. Many of those troops now seem doomed to remain in both places for some time to come, at a continuing cost in the blood of our finest youths, and billion dollar drains on our treasury. So, instead, perhaps now is the time to tell both of them – We've done everything possible to help you get back on your feet, but for the past nine years, you've just picked out pockets, while our troops did the dying for you, and neither of you have ever gotten your acts together. Now, shape up, quit playing games with us, or we're out of here….tomorrow. You and the Taliban and al Queda all deserve each other…or words to that effect.
Which leaves us with a big question. Do any of us really believe that this new pack of career politicos we've been dumb enough to vote back into office again, have either the smarts or the political guts to take such actions?
Even money says….they don't.
CENTURION
THE CENTURION CHRONICLE
Special Issue – Nov 2010
FACING THE AFTERMATH
(means moving forward briskly – lest the past gain on us)
If nothing else, this midterm election has shown that when the American electorate gets riled up – career politicos can, and do, find themselves unemployed, replaced either by insurgent neophytes to the political arena; or, by those politicos who were quick and clever enough to have changed their spots, to keep themselves feeding at the trough of "public service."
Whether that's a good thing, or not, is hard to say. The way things are, the neophytes might not do any better for us, but, they certainly can't do any worse. As for those politicos claiming to have changed their spots, they're still leopards, so we can only hope such a political shake up will have convinced them to really change their usual ways as well. Of course, that's a long shot. We'll just have to wait and see if they really have.
The hard reality we face today is that there are no quickie fixes for our many problems…. jobs, taxes, deficit spending, a humongous debt load, home foreclosures, a devalued dollar (almost on life support), all combined with meager economic growth, etc.. All of these issues are interconnected. It will take considered and carefully thought out measures just to begin resolving them. Knee-jerk reactions that might stampede us in the wrong directions, in the wrong way….just won't cut it. So clearly, let's hope that all those we've now put into office are people who will focus on doing what's right for the country as a whole, rather than for any particular interest.
That's a tall order, and we shouldn't be naïve or delude ourselves that they'll live up to our expectations. Neophytes or old hands….they're all still political animals.
Well, it's one hell of a load of manure we've allowed to pile up in this American barn of ours, so let's just watch and see how they go about cleaning it out.
Meanwhile, let's keep our own pitchforks handy, just in case we need to remind them again…in 2012.
CENTURION