KISS for Voters.

FOR STUPID VOTERS, KEEP IT SIMPLE.

Orwell had it right. Police are not the pigs, they are the dogs. The pigs are the patricians, the politicians and CEOs, intelligent but amoral, and they live only to fatten themselves. Remember the little pig Snowball, who tried to create public works to benefit all the animals? The pigs who traded the old working horse to the knacker for a box of jam had Snowball assassinated, called him a Jonesist, and then took credit for his ideas. They recognized most of the animals were not so smart, sheep, geese, and cattle, for whom the fine points of rhetoric went right over their heads, so they reduced every issue to a slogan. Today’s Neopublicans have done just that, and now have given us six such slogans which will answer most any question that can be put to them. Here they are:

1. The Red, White, and Blue.
2. Drill, Baby, Drill.
3. Don’t tax the boss.
4. Back to Jesus Christ.
5. Look at Clinton’s penis.
6. Duuh, Pelosi.

“What morally justifies whatever we do?” The Red, White, and Blue.
“What must be done to save the economy?” DBD, and DTB.
“How to save the education system?” Back to Jesus, and the RWB.
“What about corrupt Republicans?” Look at Clinton’s penis.
“What is wrong with Democrats’ policy?” Duuh, Pelosi.
“Why make war against Islam?” JC, RWB, & DBD, a trifecta.

You see how it works. Here is a subset of #6: “Why is global warming wrong?” Duuh. Al Gore. You could call, “Don’t give Mexicans my lunch,” a corollary to #3.
Go ahead, try it. How to make the Congress honest, and to work as one? Back to JC. What about vice, crime in the streets, and in the science labs and hospitals? That’s JC too, waging an unending zero-tolerance War On Sin. What about when they sin? One screws his secretary, gets his Mama to pay her and hires her husband on the public nickel. So? Obviously, look at Clinton’s penis, but what about someone who cooks the CIA and lies to the public to start a war for corporate profits? What about that? Hey, he didn’t get a blowjob and lie about it, did he? Clinton’s penis trumps any Bush card. Go ahead, try some, but be careful. They are just so sensible, and so believable, and so easy to remember, you might find yourself believing them. How could you have not seen it sooner? Duuh. Pelosi!


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